Tucker

My heart hurts tonight. We said goodbye to the most incredible dog I have ever known. Our sweet Tucker died yesterday and I have really struggled with him being gone. Our home feels different without him here. I miss him so much. I am astonished at how so completely this small creature captured my heart. 

Mid December, Tucker started having seizures. They were scary to witness and made us very worried about what was happening to our puppy. Mariska came home for Christmas on December 19th. we took Tucker the vet on the 20th. He had cancer 2 years ago but we had the tumor removed. We were worried that maybe the cancer was back. The doctor took his blood and started him on an antiseizure medication. His blood came back clean so the doctor thought that Tucker may have had a brain tumor. We thought the seizures had stopped but Tucker was having small ones where he stared off or had little body twitches. We took him back in to the vet on January 3rd. We saw a different vet and she was amazing. She took some x-rays and discovered that Tucker was in the starts of heart failure. She told us that we caught it really early and that dogs his size could live to be 15 or 16 on heart medication. We started him on the heart medication right away. It took two days for us to see improvement. 

There was one night that I asked John to give Tucker a blessing because he was struggling so much. We were worried he wouldn't make it through the night or that we would need to take him to the vet to have him put down. The next morning Tucker was a little better and over the next few days he continued to improve. The heart medication was working! We had our puppy back. Last week was so good! Tucker ran around, was eating and seemed almost normal. He was a little slower than before but we thought we were through the worst of it and that he was going to be ok. 

On Saturday afternoon, Tucker had a really big seizure. It took him a couple of minutes to recover from it. He was still on antiseizure medication so we didn't understand why he would have had a seizure. We called the vet. She was unavailable. We decided to move on with our day and wait for her to call. We went on our A date. The vet called while we were out and had us adjust the dose on Tucker's seizure medication. We did exactly that when we gave him his meds before bed.

Tucker ran up the stairs and stopped in the doorway of the bedroom. John called him over to his bed but he wouldn't move and suddenly fell over. His whole body went rigid and he cried out. Both John and I sat with him in the hallway letting him know we were there and that he was ok. It took about 7 minutes for Tucker to come out of this seizure. He seemed ok when he finally did respond to us. We got ready for bed and proceeded with our night. I had a really rough night. I woke up in pain around 2:30. I think I had a cyst rupture. When I got up, Tucker was up walking around. I laid back down and he came to the side of the bed and put his paws up. He had been doing that with John and we decided not to let him up on the bed. I instead rubbed his head and his back. When I stopped, he would nuzzle his head under my hand so I would continue to rub him. 

I fell asleep and woke up a couple more times to Tucker walking around the room. I wish I would have realize that something was wrong. When John got up in the morning he took Tucker downstairs. After the last seizure, we decided that Tucker should be carried up and down the stairs. John said that Tucker's legs were very limp when he picked him up. When he took Tucker outside, Tucker couldn't stand. John brought Tucker back inside and laid him in his bed downstairs. John came upstairs to tell me that he thought Tucker was dying and needed to come downstairs. John went back down and saw Tucker take his last breathe. He checked Tucker and realized that he was gone. John came back upstairs and told me. 

I can't express the feeling I had in that moment. I came downstairs and saw Tucker laying there. He was gone.

John, Jack and I sat with Tucker for hours while we waited for the service to come and get him. I took the picture above after Tucker had passed. I wish we knew that his last day was Saturday. I wish I had let him up on the bed. I wish I was faster getting downstairs so I could have seen him before he died. I wish we had longer with him. I am grateful for the time we did have. I am grateful that his last week was a good one. I am grateful he passed here at home with us. I am grateful it happened when we were home. I am grateful he came into our lives and brought us so much joy. We all loved this sweet dog. He was a huge part of our family. As Jack put it below, He was just the best dog!

Love and miss you Tucker.💛

 

Alphabet Date Letter A

This year, John and I are trying something different. We are doing alphabet dates. Each date we go on will revolve around one letter. The activity we do, the places we go and the food we eat. We had our first alphabet date tonight. We celebrated our Anniversary. Had fun perfecting our Archery techniques. Enjoyed an Amazing dinner at Applebee's where we watched the Rams Annihilate the Panthers chance of going to the Superbowl.  

We each managed a bullseye!!! 

We learned the we are not very good shots.🤣 Probably wont be using a bow and arrow to defend ourselves.  

It was such a fun night! I am so looking forward to each date night! Love this guy so much! 

I Love to see the temple!

 

On January 2nd, we had the opportunity of watching Mariska receive her endowments at the Las Vegas temple. What an experience!! It was incredible being in the temple with my daughter. I am so grateful for the choices she has made that brought her to this point. It was wonderful to see the people that love and support her there. I can't put into words the feelings I had that night. I love being in the temple and being there with so many people that I love made the night even better. 

We had planned on taking Mariska out to dinner after the temple but she was a bit overwhelmed from the experience and asked if we could pick dinner up and go home. It was a good plan and we enjoyed the time we got to spend together the 3 of us. 

I really look forward to going to the temple with Mariska again! 

 

Happy New Year 2026

 So, I have been thinking about this Blog a lot lately. It has been a little over 14 years since I last posted. A LOT has happened in that 14 years. I stopped posting on social media 2 years ago and I find myself wanting an outlet for the things happening in my life. John asked me what I was doing. When I responded I was updating my blog, he laughed and said, "No, really. What are you doing?" 😂

I think since it has been so long, an update on us and where we are at would be ok. 

Jack has become a bit of a musical master. He plays the French horn, mellophone, trumpet, piano, harmonica and is learning the guitar. He has also started composing music. He is busy with music all week long. He participated in the marching band at school. They competed for the first time and took 1st place in their division! He also participates in the Premier Band and the Conservatory Symphony at school. The Premier Band was invited to play at Carnegie Hall in March. They were one of 12 bands across the nation to be invited! Such a big deal and we are so excited to see him perform in such a prestigious concert hall. He is in 10th grade and it was a bit of a shock for me when I registered him for 11th grade. He turned 16 in October. He is nervous about getting his drivers license and it has been a struggle to get him to take the test for his permit. Our goal is for him to have his license by the time he turns 17. 😉He is big into video games, D and D and Magic the Gathering. He is one of my favorite people and love the conversations I often have with him. I am grateful for the relationship I have with him. 💖 

Mariska is all grown up and has moved to Idaho for school. She is an incredible human being and has overcome so much. She has 3 learning disabilities and graduated high school with a 3.8 GPA. She is getting her degree in music 💖education and wants to be a high school band teacher. She is an excellent Flutist and piccolo player. She moved back in September and loves being on her own. She loves to crochet and is very talented at it! It has been the best two weeks having her home for Christmas and New and Year. She has been studying and preparing herself to go through the temple and received her endowment on January 2nd. It was the best way to start the year! It was incredible to be with her in the temple. She made comment on the number of people that attended with her. She said it was so good to see everyone that is in her corner.💖I have to say, I agree wholeheartedly! She goes home tomorrow and that makes this momma's heart sad. 😞However, I am so proud of her and the woman she has become! I can't wait to see how her future unfolds. 

John is amazing! He is still with the same company he started with when we moved to Vegas. He loves the people he works with. The job sometimes is hard and overwhelming but we are grateful for the blessings that his job has provided us. He was working with the activity days boys at church but was recently released from that calling. He and I were called to be Temple and Family History consultants in our ward today. I am very excited to be working with him in a calling. It has been 20 years since we have done that! John is my rock and I honestly don't know what I would do without him. He has helped me so much with my family and my own personal hardships. I am glad he is my best friend. Today is our 23rd anniversary. 💖 We didn't get to celebrate this weekend but we will be celebrating on Saturday with a special date. 

I am working as a Special Education teacher at a charter middle school. I love my job most of the time. 😂There are days I wonder what I was thinking getting into that career. I have been at the same school for 5 years. I love the people I work with! I have a great team! As much as I love my team, I am not looking forward to going back tomorrow. These last two weeks have been wonderful! I have been the ward music chairman for the last 3 years and as I said before, now have a new calling. I started taking piano lessons a few months ago. I love it, but I have had a hard time getting into a regular practice schedule. 

I have a couple goals for myself this year. I want to read 35 books, practice the piano at least 4 times a week, follow the Come Follow Me program for the Old Testament, walk with John as many nights a week as we can and lose 50 lbs. I have also been thinking about starting up on my clarinet and preparing to audition for the concert band at CSN. I am really nervous about that last one, so we shall see. 

I hope that this year brings lots of laughs and joy! 

 

Happy Anniversary Mom and Dad!!!

My mom and dad celebrated their 30th wedding anniversary this year! I feel so fortunate to have such long standing marriages in my family. Both sets of Grandparents have been married for 50 years and then my parents with 30. John and I are working up on 9. I sincerely hope that 20 years from now I love him as much or more than I do today.

To celebrate mom and dads anniversary we all went to Brian head Utah and stayed in what has to be the most beautiful cabin I have ever seen. This place had everything from a kitchenaid standmixer to central heating.We arrived at the cabin to a lot of snow!! Had to shovel the driveway for us to even get into the house. It was such a great weekend. All the kids sans Jack had a blast with me and my dad out in the snow. Well they had a blast with dad, I was taking pictures.

Grandpa pushing Mariska down a little hill

AVALANCHE!!!!!

"Mariska, it would be easier to make a snow angel if you were laying down."

Mariska and Matthew

Dad throwing himself down the hill.

The aftermath.

The driveway was not that steep so the kids didn't go very fast but they usually made all the way across the street before they came to a stop.

I went too!

Mom brought some craft projects for me and my sisters to do. The kids had fun playing with all the toys that the cabin had including the Foosball and pool tables. On Saturday night we had a family home evening. Each individual family had to prepare a little presentation to share. It was so nice to be in such a beautiful place with the people I love, and to feel the spirit as strongly as I did. I tried to make waffle from a brownie mix that night. I didn't like them that much, they were just really hard cookies. On Sunday Dad offered a devotional and that afternoon we came home.

I sure do love my family! Thanks mom and dad for bringing me into it, and thanks for letting us celebrate your big day with you! Happy 30th Wedding Anniversary!!!!

Dance Class

Guess who started taking dance lessons!

She really surprised me by picking the blue. I thought for sure she would pick the pink. It is really fun to see her dancing and she loves it. The class that she is in is a tap/ballet class so she has both ballet and tap shoes. It's so fun to have a girly girl.

Springs Preserve

We found a fairly new place to visit and had a lot of fun when we went. Very kid friendly and kid oriented but plenty to do for adults also. The kids had a blast hanging with Grandma and Grandpa and their cousins.

First day of school 2011

We are one year away from Kindergarten. Cannot believe how time has flown.